All Millennials Do Is Complain | Not My Generation

By definition, I am a millennial. I was born in 1991 like a lot of other really cool, normal, high-functioning adults, but in my opinion, I've been lumped into one of the worst demographics known to man. And while I hate a lot of things about the way Millennials choose to be, there's one thing I absolutely cannot stand.

Millennials are celebrated regardless of talent, drive, passion, or goals.

They're a generation that's given the highest honor for everything and anything.

They're a generation where everyone gets a prize, despite the amount of effort put in. You live through another day, you win.

It's frustrating to witness, mostly because common Millennials aren't moving mountains, curing cancer, or doing anything that's worth taking note of. And yet the mere fact that they exist is celebrated. Why? Because they kick and scream, clawing their way to the top of the "Get Your Attention Here!" queue.

Story time.

I was raised in a home where you were "guilty until proven innocent." If I were ever in trouble, it was my fault until I proved otherwise. Most of the time it was a simple explanation - I wasn't a bad kid that was constantly in trouble, and while there were a few times my innocence was a bit harder to prove, at the end of the day my parents were always on my side. 

Similarly, my accomplishments were celebrated, but it was clear that I could always do better. In other words, success was a journey, not a destination. There was always more I could achieve. 

All in all, this was an excellent parenting method because A) I turned out perfectly fine and B) I think it's a great way to prevent your kid from becoming a stereotypical crybaby. 
(noun) A person who will go to a variety of lengths to get people to sympathize with them, get their way, or gain total world domination.
synonyms:  sissy; millennial
My mom's pretty proud of the way I turned out. The way I was raised has allowed me to do cool things like handle criticism and avoid displaying Negative Attention Seeking Behaviors (NASB), which I learned at a very young age were annoying AF.

In their simplest form, NASB are exhibited to attract the wrong kind of attention. Pissed off because your mom's paying more mind to her friends and a bottle of wine than she's giving you? Kick your bedroom door shut so she storms up the stairs to scream at ya. Having a bad day? Don't say a word until someone asks "Are you okay? You've been so quiet..."

At some time or another, we've all demonstrated these behaviors. Fortunately, in a normal cycle of evolution from childhood to adulthood, we learn that these behaviors are viewed as obnoxious and eventually deem them as ineffective.

This makes sense because in essence, NASB equate to childish tendencies (re:  crybaby). And yet, adults everywhere showcase these behaviors on a daily basis. Sure, they're not dropping to the floor at Target, wildly flailing their arms screaming and crying because they've run out of a shoe size, but Millennial adults are cunning and will work pepper NASB into everyday life for as long as it takes until they get a reaction from someone, somewhere.

I've seen it. I'm sure you've seen it. Hell, maybe you've even done it.

And yes, I am a millennial, but I actively try to avoid these behaviors. If I feel a NASB coming on, I tamp it down because I know it's not going to help me achieve anything and it's certainly not the kind of person I want to be. The rest of my generation is definitely in some kind of regression. 80's and 90's babies are no longer shedding their NASB skin and are instead being rewarded for their negative, nasty, vibe-ruining choices. 

My mom claims to be working on a book with the working title "Fuck The Millennials." In an effort to gain control over what plagues this generation, I think I'll help her.

PSA:  Don't display Negative Attention Seeking Behaviors as an adult. In most cases, they won't work. They won't attract sympathy from your parents; they'll make them think "Where did I go wrong?" They won't give you a leg up on your competition in the workforce; instead, they'll fuel conversations that happen behind your back. They wont help you win friends and influence people; instead, they'll leave them thinking you're pretty much incapable of breathing without a constant pat on the back and a reassuring "there, there Millennial."